One lesson I'm really embracing is that I get to protect myself should the need arise. I get to say no in situations that might hurt me or make me feel badly about myself. And it's amazing the power this realization wields.
I have one unread email in my inbox.
If this was my work inbox, that would go without saying. I'm so overloaded, I currently have 197 emails unread from today alone...and I've been answering emails all day. But for my personal email, I cherish correspondence and typically read them immediately. Still, this one unread email remains...from my once-dear friend.
Yes, I'm curious as to what it might hold. But, I also know that, based on where our conversations left off, it most likely will be laced with words that have the ability to break me, to hurt me, to make me feel...low. And something about that makes me angry...not at the writer of the email, necessarily. But more just the thought that I might allow one single message to make me feel badly about who I am.
So with each new day, I'm less and less tempted to read it or even curious about what's in it. At this point, it stands as a symbol to me that I'm ok...I'm a good person who makes mistakes. I'm a solid and loyal friend who sometimes is weak. I'm a likable person that deserves better.
Maybe one day I'll read this email...but maybe not. Either way, it's being the one that gets to choose, and making the choice that works for me, that makes me STRONG.
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