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Admittedly, he's kinda hard to make out in my attempting-to-be-stealth photo taking, but he kinda took my breath away. I was ALL about this guy. He made me think of MC's in so many of my books...lean, close-shaven hair, heroic, witty, strong, an amazing lover...emotionally unattainable until he meets me and I help him open up.
But when I showed my coworkers the picture of the "omg he's so hot" guy I saw at the airport, they looked at me like I was crazy. My fantasy man was just shot down...and I kinda took it personally! I mean, to each his/her own when it comes to attraction. But I had already played out our story in my head! So when he and I start dating, will my friends judge me because they don't think he's hot?
And then it hit me...I am certifiably insane.
Apparently, I see real-life men through a romance-reader's lens and now I am no longer able to separate LIFE from PAGE!
A few months ago, I was asked out on a date by a New York City fireman. Now, for many single women, this is kind of like winning the lottery. The man was ruggedly handsome, polite, charming...and he asked me out while I was hungover waiting at a deli for a greasy breakfast sandwich. He found me adorable. :) A meet-cute for the most perfect romance novel.
Well, we met for a drink...which was fine. We met again for coffee...which was less fine. We met again for a walk...which was even less fine. So after 3 dates, I was bored, he was unimpressed, and it fizzled.
Three years ago, this would have been chalked up to "*shrug*...just wasn't a connection". Now that I'm knee-deep in romance novels, I actually mourned the loss of a potential HEA. I felt saddened by all the pages of fun plot points that failed to happen. And my greatest disappointment was that this real life guy didn't turn out to be anything like my book boyfriends.
So, as I lick my wounds that my friends don't find baggage-claim-guy hot as I had already planned out how we'd run into each other at the ticket counter of the airport next week, laughing that we had noticed each other after that long Hong Kong flight...I realized...
I NEED A LIFE...a REAL ONE.
1 comment:
I have been in the process of writing a response to this from the moment I read it. It really resonated with me. As readers I think we all struggle sometimes with balancing the reality of our lives with what we read. Sometimes as we finish a book, its perfect ending preserved in amber, and especially when life is not behaving how we want it to be it's hard not think - why isn't my life like that ? I think that's completely normal (well at least I hope so).
The pace of life in a novel is rarely matched in RL, novels distill emotions and events which they need to to keep the reader focused, if life was like a romance novel we would be exhausted - rarely does anyone do 'normal' things.
My response was originally so much longer - but honestly, what I believe is that while our circumstances can be identical or similar to the novels we read, the reality is that the pace is different. However that doesn't mean that we ( and I actually mean you) shouldn't get your happy ending, whatever that means for you.
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